ANGER
MANAGEMENT
Stephen
ZoBell, PhD
1. There is hope, you CAN
learn to manage your anger. Others have
done it. Study their examples and
emulate them.
2. Avoid blaming. Take responsibility for the consequences and
management of anger. Apologize to those you
have hurt.
3. Avoid self-pity. Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
4. Learn triggers that
initiate anger – take charge of reinterpreting triggers—they don’t need to
trigger anger—they could trigger compassion or positive responses.
5. Behind anger is usually hurt,
pain, disappointment or shame. Seek to
reconcile these issues within yourself and remember the Savior´s Atonement can
help with healing if you will ask.
6. Identify angry thoughts
and angry self-talk. Replace them with
thoughts of compassion and positive self-talk.
Make lists. Keep track of your
success.
7. Identify angry behavior
and replace with constructive behavior.
Make lists. Keep track of
successes.
8. If anger is intense, use
time out concepts, thought stopping processes, replacement options and/or
relaxation exercises until you have calmed down.
9. Anger is usually
accompanied with energy. Have concrete written
goals and channel the energy into productive approaches: clean, fix, help, organize, build, serve—and
keep a record of the good you do.
1 Anger is often aimed at other people and may
include harsh or negative judgments or critical statements. Learn to replace criticism with compassion
and kind thoughts and words. Keep track
of the times you have succeeded.
11 In the real world, as well as in the media
world, we see many who exemplify anger.
Find role models of people who can control their anger, rather than
focusing on those in real life or the media who find excuses for losing their
temper.
